i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
there is glitter all over my balls
Randomize