Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Randomize
