Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
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