I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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