I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
