the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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