she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Randomize
