dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
porn star boner night. come get it.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
jump out the window naked night went bad
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