There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
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