Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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