East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
