Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Randomize
