yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
