ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*