the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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