all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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