i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
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