naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
