You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
