Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
