she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
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By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
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but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain