We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy