i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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