I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
