Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Randomize
