Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Randomize
