I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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