so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
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