YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Randomize
