There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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