we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize