Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize