I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Do you have feelings for this penis?
we're so committed to being not committed
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
