I can't breathe out the right side of my face
its not stalking. its research.
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
