Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
