Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
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