Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Randomize
