i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I can't turn off my feet"
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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