Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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