i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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