I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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