Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
