First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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