This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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