I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize