i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
its not stalking. its research.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
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