just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
They took my balls.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
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