there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
