Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
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