marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
