my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
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