If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
I am one with the molecules
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
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